Twas the Day of Implementation
The following is NOT 100% original, nor is it 100% plagiarized. This is a modified version of “Twas the Night Before Implementation“, which of course was modified from, “Twas the Night Before Christmas.”
Here’s some background you may need to know to fully comprehend the following. This was the report I submitted to our Minister of Administration after completing a major upgrade to our network soon after I started working here. We were replacing our Netware 4.x server with a Linux server running Samba. At that time, Tom was our resident handyman/electrician who helped me run cable. He was tall and skinny and could fit in those tight places I couldn’t. Nelson is our Minister of Administration, a.k.a. the boss. Rick is in charge of our Senior Adult ministry. He turns his computer on about once a week to check his email. (Occasionally he has trouble with this.) Carol is the primary data entry person for our ChMS. And last of all is Wade, our Missions Minister who can be a bit ornery.
Twas the Day of Implementation
(based on “Twas the Night before Implementation” author unkown;
rewritten by Bryson Medlock)
Twas the day of implementation and all through the house
Every one of the users were forbidden to browse
The cables were hung in the ceiling with care
As Tom came down the ladder, drywall in his hair
The users were trying to figure out what Bryson said
While visions of email danced in their heads
Nelson sat in his big office and he was crying still
For Friday he received the new server bill
When out in the computer room there arose such a clatter,
He sprang from his large desk to see what was the matter
And to his wondering eyes he saw who?
Just Bryson (the geek) with a six-pack of Dew
He rushed down the hall to do his magic
And with his geek speak he baffled Rick
More rapid than eagles, his fingers they flew,
And he spoke and he muttered and he sipped on his Dew.
“On configure! On make! On updates! Install!
On batch jobs! On logins! On functions! Make all!”
His eyes were glazed over, fingers nimble and lean,
From weekends and nights in front of the screen.
A wink of his eye, and a twitch of his head,
Soon gave Nelson to know he had nothing to dread.
He spoke not a word, but continued to work,
Configuring the server, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his fingers upon the “ENTER” key,
The system came up and worked perfectly.
The configs configured, the code was compiled,
The users logged on, and files were filed
He tested each whistle, and tested each bell,
With nary an abend, and all had gone well.
The system was finished, the tests were concluded,
And Carol’s last changes were even included.
And then Wade observed with a grin and a taunt,
“It’s just what I asked for, but not what I want!”
